Al's 2021 Hot Takes

Well boys, it's the fall and the smell of bonfires, hayrides, and Yanni’s trash from last week is floating in the air again. The temperature is dropping and the leaves are changing color which can only mean one thing - football is upon us. As always, this column is written for the purpose of shock and awe - if you want analysis from someone making logical assumptions based on empirical data, then you my friend are in the wrong place. These takes are HOT and bold, like chase’s favorite new Dorito spin-off; not to mention, sometimes, they’re actually spot on! Last year we correctly predicted the pats and browns missing and making the postseason respectfully, as well as some trouble in paradise in Green Bay…All that being said, I also said Justin Herbert was a huge bust so clearly, I’m not fuckin’ Nostradamus over here (Frank, he was an old philosopher who people said could predict the future.)

Anyways, without further ado, AL’S 2021 HOT TAKES:

1) TWO TEAMS WHO MADE THE PLAYOFFS LAST YEAR BUT WILL SIGNIFICANTLY REGRESS -

- TENNESSEE TITANS -

THE LOSS OF OFFENSIVE COORDINATOR ARTHUR SMITH PROVES TO BE VERY COSTLY AS RYAN TANNEHILL SHOWS GLIMPSES OF HIS DAYS IN MIAMI - CARELESS IN THE POCKET AND TURNOVER PRONE. WHILE THE ADDITION OF JULIO JONES WILL HELP FILL THE VOID LEFT BY COREY DAVIS’ DEPARTURE, AN INJURY TO DERRICK HENRY AFTER ANOTHER SEASON OF GETTING TOO MANY CARRIES WILL SIMPLY BE TOO MUCH TO OVERCOME.

- PITTSBURGH STEELERS -

SORRY ROB :( UNFORTUNATELY FOR MIKE TOMLIN, HE PULLED THE ANTI-BELICHICK AND WAITED A YEAR TOO LONG WITH BEN. NAJEE HARRIS WILL BE A BRIGHT SPOT, BUT BEHIND ONE OF THE WORST OFFENSIVE LINES IN THE LEAGUE, THE STEELERS WILL STRUGGLE TO FIND THE BALANCE THEY NEED. THE HANDICAPPERS IN VEGAS ALSO SEEM TO THINK SOMETHING IS OFF - SETTING THE SEASON WIN TOTAL FOR THE STEELERS AT A MEASLY 9 GAMES. ONE HAS TO WONDER, COMING OFF A 13-3 CAMPAIGN LAST YEAR, WHY SO LOW?

2) TWO TEAMS READY TO MAKE THE “LEAP”

- NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS - AFTER WATCHING TOM BRADY HOIST ANOTHER LOMBARDI TROPHY, COACH BELICHICK IS HUNGRY FOR BLOOD. THIS OFFSEASON, THE PATRIOTS SPENT MORE IN FREE AGENCY THAN ANYONE IN HISTORY, THEY GOT BACK ALL-PROS LIKE KYLE VAN NOY AND DONTA HIGHTOWER FROM COVID HOLDOUTS, AND DRAFTED THE FUTURE OF THEIR FRANCHISE IN MAC JONES. I BELIEVE HE LEADS THEM TO AN 11-6 RECORD AND A PLAYOFF BERTH IN HIS FIRST YEAR UNDER CENTER.

-DENVER BRONCOS - THE BRONCOS FINALLY HAVE A QB THAT WONT LOSE THEM BALL GAMES IN TEDDY BRIDGEWATER. COMBINE THAT WITH THE FACT THAT THEIR SKILL POSITION PLAYERS (JERRY JEUDY, KJ HAMLER, COURTLAND SUTTON, JAVONTA WILLIAMS) AND DEFENSIVE FRONT SEEM POISED FOR AN INCREDIBLE YEAR, I DONT SEE HOW THEY MISS THE PLAYOFFS. THEY FINISH 10-7 AND EARN ONE OF THE WILDCARD PLAYOFF SPOTS.

3) THE YEAR OF THE QB

- WITH THE ADDED GAME, AS WELL AS THE EVOLUTION OF THE SPORT BENEFITTING OFFENSES TREMENDOUSLY, WE MAY SEE SEVERAL SIGNAL CALLERS BREAK RECORDS PREVIOUSLY HELD FOR DECADES. PATRICK MAHOMES, MATHEW STAFFORD, AND DAK PRESCOTT WILL ALL THROW FOR OVER 5000 YARDS. TREVOR LAWRENCE WILL ALSO BREAK JUSTIN HERBERTS ROOKIE RECORD OF 31 TD PASSES.

4) COACH OF THE YEAR

- SEAN PAYTON. MANY FAILED TO REALIZE THAT THE SAINTS DID WELL LAST SEASON NOT BECAUSE OF DREW BREES, BUT IN SPITE OF HIM. THE SAINTS WERE A JARED COOK FUMBLE AWAY FROM A SUPER BOWL APPEARANCE DESPITE THE FACT THAT DREW BREES LOOKED LIKE HE WAS SHOT-PUTTING AN EXTREMELY HEAVY ROCK AROUND THE FIELD. I EXPECT JAMEIS WINSTON (FRESH OFF LASIK EYE SURGERY) TO PLAY LIKE A MAN POSSESSED - JAMEIS BASICALLY THREW FOR 50 TD’S IN 2018 WITHOUT BEING ABLE TO SEE WHO HE WAS THROWING TO. I EXPECT THE INFRASTRUCTURE OF NEW ORLEANS AND THE SECOND YEAR IN THE SYSTEM TO PAY OFF IMMENSELY AS THE SAINTS RETURN TO THE POSTSEASON AND EARN COACH PAYTON THE COTY AWARD.

5) THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE

- THE NFC WEST WILL HAVE THREE PLAYOFF TEAMS AND ESSENTIALLY EAT EACHOTHER ALIVE. THE SEAHAWKS, NINERS, AND RAMS ARE ALL PLAYOFF BOUND WHILE KYLER MURRAY AND THE CARDINALS WILL REGRESS SIGNIFICANTLY. IT SEEMS AS THOUGH THE KLIFF KINGSBURY EXPIREMENT HAS FAILED AS THE CARDINALS - WHO ALREADY CLAIMED THAT THEY WOULD BE LIMITING KYLERS RUSHING ATTEMPTS THIS SEASON, WILL STRUGGLE EARLY AND OFTEN. ITS BAD ENOUGH THAT 6 OF THEIR GAMES COME AGAINST THE 3 TEAMS MENTIONED ABOVE, BUT THOSE AS THEY SAY, ARE THE BREAKS. KLIFF’S PUZZLING GAME MANAGEMENT AND IN -GAME DECISIONS WILL CONTINUE TO HAUNT A TALENTED TEAM IN NEED OF A LEADER.

6) OFFENSIVE ROOKIE OF THE YEAR - MAC JONES

DEFENSIVE ROOKIE OF THE YEAR - JAYCEE HORN / PATRICK SURTAIN

7) TROUBLE IN PARADISE CONTINUED…

THE GREEN BAY PACKERS WILL BE SIGNIFICANTLY WORSE THIS SEASON THAN LAST. THE FRONT OFFICE HAS ALREADY OFFSET AARON RODGERS’ SALARY FOR 2022 AND IT SEEMS LIKE AN INEVITABILITY AT THIS POINT THAT THIS IS AARON’S LAST SEASON PLAYING UNDER CENTER IN GREEN BAY. AS A RESULT, I PREDICT THAT THE DISTRACTIONS ARE SIMPLY TOO SIGNIFICANT TO OVERCOME. THEY MAY MAKE THE PLAYOFFS DUE TO THEIR EXTREMELY WEAK DIVISION, BUT YOU CAN BET THAT AARON RODGERS IS ALREADY DREAMING OF PURCHASING REAL ESTATE IN DENVER OR LAS VEGAS FOR NEXT SEASON…I HATE TO TOOT MY OWN HORN ON THIS ONE BUT THIS WAS CALLED TWO YEARS AGO, AND DOUBLED DOWN ON LAST YEAR SO….BEEP BEEP.

8) NFC/ AFC TITLE GAMES -

BUCANEERS/ RAMS

BILLS/CHIEFS

SUPER BOWL - CHIEFS OVER RAMS

9) ROOKIE QB PREDICTIONS -

THIS IS ALWAYS HARD FOR ME BECAUSE AS MANY OF YOU KNOW, I LOVE COLLEGE FOOTBALL A WHOLE LOT, AND I TEND TO INHERENTLY ROOT FOR PEOPLE TO SUCEED. THAT BEING SAID, I TEND TO BE A BIT OVER OPTIMISTIC ON ROOKIE QB’S BECAUSE IM GENUINELY ROOTING FOR THEM. THIS YEAR IN PARTICULAR IS CRAZY BECAUSE I GENUINELY SAW INCREDIBLE THINGS FROM ALMOST EVERY ROOKIE THIS PRE-SEASON. I KNOW, I KNOW, ITS THE PRE-SEASON! BUT IF IT DIDNT MATTER AT ALL, THEY SIMPLY WOULDNT PLAY THE GAMES…

TREVOR LAWRENCE IS THE ENTIRE PACKAGE. BEST PROSPECT SINCE ANDREW LUCK. ARM TALENT, MEASURABLES, TOUCH, MOBILITY - THE KIDS LITERALLY GOT IT ALL. AS I SAID EARLIER, BECAUSE OF THE FACT THAT HE’LL OFTEN BE PLAYING CATCH-UP, I THINK HE BREAKS JUSTIN HERBERTS ROOKIE RECORD OF 31 TD PASSES.

MAC JONES IS ATHLETICALLY LIMITED, BUT LIKE TOM BRADY, HE MANIPULATES THE POCKET, SLIDES UP WHEN HE HAS TO AVOID THE RUSH, AND DOESNT HAVE TO RUN TO BE EFFECTIVE. I BELIEVE HIS NUMBERS WONT BE AS GOOD AS LAWRENCE’S, BUT DUE TO THE FACT THAT HES ON A WINNING TEAM, HE WILL WIN ROOKIE OF THE YEAR.

ZACH WILSON - PROBABLY THE MOST INTERESTING PROSPECT WITH ARGUABLY THE BEST ARM TALENT. THE BALL LITERALLY JUMPS OUT OF HIS HAND. UNFORTUNATELY HE SHARES TOO MUCH OF THE BAD QUALITIES OF A JOHHNY MANZIEL/BAKER MAYFIELD. UNDERSIZED, AND PLAYING ON A TEAM DEVOID OF ANY REAL TALENT RIGHT NOW - IM WORRIED ABOUT HIS CHANCES TO SUCCEED IN THE LONG RUN.

JUSTIN FIELDS - HE LITERALLY LOOKS LIKE CAM NEWTON WITH THROWING ABILITY. OR A BIGGER STRONGER DESHAUN WATSON. GRANTED THE BEARS ARE PRETTY SHITTY TOP TO BOTTOM. BUT I BELIEVE THEY WILL LET HIM START WEEK 4 WHEN THE SCHEDULE SOFTENS UP A BIT AND HOPE FOR THE BEST.